Carl Pavano, Evil Incarnate, and Other Irrefutable Truths

All good things must come to an end, I guess. The Tigers are no longer undefeated this year in games I've attended. This thanks to Satan's underling Carl Pavano, and the, ahem, Detroit Tigers pitching staff.

I feel all guilt-ridden and shamed because my mom, dad and sister had come in from out-of-town, don't get to go to many games, and...THIS is what they got.

Andrew Oliver--no can find strike zone.

Eddie Bonine--no can strand inherited baserunners.

Brad Thomas--gives back runs after we just scored.

You guys make me sick. Sorry. I don't mean to be shrewish when we took two of three from the Twinks, but it was just the circumstances. My poor sister dejectedly trudged down the concourse, mumbling about being bad luck. She doesn't deserve that. She's all gung ho long distance from the corn fields of Indiana. She could be rooting for the Cubs for sobbing out loud. She told her fourth grade class she was going to come up for a playoff game last fall. The little rugrats were ready to turn the classroom into a sweat shop, churning out all manner of adorable fourth grade-y posterboard signs. Oh. Yeah. We didn't make the playoffs last fall. Well then. Bitterness.

I did warn the family of Pavano's eerie dominance over the Tigers, and Oliver's, um, uneven performance in the bigs so far. It didn't really help to temper the optimism that we'd be Sunday afternoon victors, in first place at the All-Star break. Well then. Sulk.

We did see a couple of REALLY nice defensive plays, which had us jumping out of our seats and yelling ourselves hoarse. Ajax made an outrageous running, over-the-shoulder snag...never thought he'd get to that ball. Boesch must have been taking extra fielding practice, because he made a nice diving grab. Santiago flashed some leather at short. Alex Avila completed a nice strike 'em out, throw 'em out play on a Nick Punto attempt to steal. Well then. Half smile.

Once again, Inge provided us with the game-ending out. Mercifully it was not a strikeout looking, or I would have become yet another sordid baseball-security incident statistic. Hmmm. Does getting Tasered curb the appetite? I really could use a jump start to some weight loss.

Witness

When I read on the Tigers website that Magglio Ordóñez was one hit shy of 2000 going into Thursday's day game against the Twinks, I was thrilled. I was going to be at that game, and I smelled my shot at seeing My Tiger hit the milestone. Even better, my seats for the game were in the front row in right field, so I could give proper acknowledgment to the feat, should it occur.

Somehow, fate has decided to befriend me. I was at the game in August 2008, when Magglio hit two home runs in one inning. This time, I was fortunate enough to see Magglio get knock 2000 and 2001, a single and a double. Both were indisputable hits, something Ordóñez himself alluded to before the game. He didn't want hit 2000 to be an infield single that could arguably have been ruled an error or some such thing.

Well, he got himself a couple no-doubters, and I was thrilled. Our whole section gave a standing ovation when Magglio came out to the field in the next half inning. He looked so modest, almost blushing, and giving just the smallest hint of a smile.

Acknowledging afterward the significance of his feat (he's only the sixth Venezuelan born player to log 2000 hits), Magglio seemed calmly pleased. I guess I jumped, shouted and clapped enough for both of us.

Dontrelle Willis pitched really well, I mean really well, not just for him, but for a starting pitcher. He allowed no runs, four hits, two walks, over 101 pitches through six innings, and no baserunner advanced past second base. I realize that the absence of the M & M boys puts a little bit of a qualifier to this start, but I'll take it, really, I'll take it any day of the week. Some of our other starters would do well to emulate his final line. Who'd have thought we'd be saying THAT at the end of April? I thought more than likely Armando Galarraga would have been called up by now to own the truth.

Carl Pavano, while going the distance in most economical fashion, was not able to toss 8 scoreless frames, so we came out winners of the game and the series. HOOORAY! I hate losing to the Twins, even more than usual after last year's game 163.

Now, Angels come into town for a redux of our series just over a week ago. Eat 'em up Tigers, eat 'em up!

Out Walking the Ledge

Sooooooooo, how do you feel this morning? (That is, if you're able to drag your tail out of bed and stagger to the computer.) Like someone worked you over like Ali's punching bag? Like you're hung over but you didn't even drink? Like your best girl (or guy) dumped you unceremoniously and without warning? All of the above?

Myself, I'm still reeling. Better recover soon, there's a day game today, folks.

I'm trying to get some perspective and quell the panic, I really am. But the way we've been playing is not helping matters at all.

Porcello did his job, I mean he didn't give up any three-run homers (cough, Jackson, Galarraga, Washburn, Fien, Bonderman, cough).

Now today we have to face Carl I-Can't-Shut-Down-Anyone-But-the-Tigers Pavano. I've already set a plan in motion to sabotage him so he can't start today. It involves luring him under the I35W Bridge, where another collapse appears imminent. Wish me luck.

Slammed

Sometimes I am unable to write a post immediately following a bad loss.  I first attempt to cool myself off by slamming a few doors with all possible force.  I've had a mirror come unmounted from the back of a door and shatter all over the floor in a trillion polygonic granules.  My, wasn't it humbling (and hazardous) performing clean-up on that mess.   If that doesn't do the trick, I've got to break out the big guns and watch my copy of the no-hitter that I downloaded off i-Tunes.

All of this is done to spare the reader from invectives spewed in a disorderly jumble.  There certainly are times when an angry post is appropriate and cathartic.  In fact, it's why I started this blog after the 2008 season.  I just had so much bile poisoning my system, it had to be released.

So much for the blow-hard intro.  My point here is that last night's loss is now becoming a pattern.  We get Greinke-d, Buehrle-d, Pavano-ed.  Who's next?  Is Cliff Lee gonna make a run at a perfect game too?  Actually, that would NOT follow the pattern.  We usually follow up such a loss with a win.  We're playing .500 ball right now, and while that's a sight better than last year, it's not entirely satisfying.  I'm feeling that our team has a legitimate shot at contending.  We'll soon know whether Willis and then Bonderman can help boost us up to the next level.

If not, and in the wake of more tainting of our game coming to light, I may just move to following and blogging  my son's rec league team.

Sincere Apologies

I did not know that I had the ability to predict the future.  My last post was an ominous foreshadowing of the game that was to follow.  For that I am sorry.  I'll refrain from such fortune-telling in the future.

If you're feeling bad about the Tigers three-game skid right now, imagine yourself a Pirate fan.  They've now gone 22 innings without scoring a run.  Eeks.

Upcoming: Carl Pavano

I know this will sound really whiny, but doesn't it seem like a "struggling" pitcher comes in and shuts us down all too often?  Enter Carl Pavano, 0-3. 9.50 ERA,  over 4 starts and 18 innings pitched.  Opponents are batting a robust .363 against Pavano.  He's only walked 5, but has given up 29, count 'em, 29 hits in his four outings this young season, resulting in a 1.89 WHIP.  He's got 16 strikeouts, eight of them coming in a six-inning start against Kansas City on April 14.  Now, his ERA is a little inflated as he only lasted one inning in his first start of the year and gave up 9 earned runs in that teeny little inning.  His other starts are as follows:

4/14, KC, 6 innings, 8 hits, 4 ER, 8 SO, 0 BB

4/19, NYY, 6 innings, 4 hits, 1 ER, 4 SO, 1 BB

4/24 MN, 5 innings, 11 hits, 5 ER, 3 SO, 1 BB

Is he gonna storm into Detroit and blow away our lineup?  I hope not, but I won't exactly be stunned if he does.

You know what?   My view of baseball is all too myopic.  I don't have time (scratch that, I don't take the time) to keep up on every MLB team.  I don't want to sound like I'm any busier than the next guy--we all make time for what we want to do.  Me, I'm focused in tunnel-vision style on the Tigers for the most part.  Surely this type of thing happens to all teams from time to time.  Maybe one of the "real" bloggers will dig into the stats and let us know whether the Tigers are more susceptible than other clubs.  I think part of it is that good ol' Rod and Mario may over-emphasize when a pitcher is struggling, and then express surprise when that guy pulls it together against the Tigers.  It's too early in this season, but many pitchers experience peaks and valleys over 162 games.  You can't just assume that a pitcher is going to continue to struggle based on the last couple starts alone.  

It's nice when a pitcher is consistent over the course of a season.  Take Armando Gallaraga, for instance, who happens to be tomorrow's starter.  He generally goes pretty deep in a game, and gives the club a chance to win.  Last year, he averaged 6.26 innings over 28 starts (Baseball Reference).  Long relief.  Um, while it is oh so gratifying to see various Tigers get playing time, rather than rotting on the bench, I'll take a quality start when given the choice.  We fans inexplicably like to give our fingernails a chance to be something more than nubs.

So Gallaraga, keep on rolling, or at least gut it out like you're so good at doing if you don't have your best stuff.  Carl Pavano???  Well, let's just say you're not a Tiger, so...