Do I?

Do I want Vladimir Guerrero to be a member of the Tigers? I have always loved watching Vlad swing at a ball just above his shoe tops, and stroke it for a hit. I also like his no batting glove wearing, pine-tar helmet sporting look. However, I'm so ambivalent right now, because the effect of Vlad on our defense would be, um, borderline catastrophic. If we add Vlad at DH, that bumps Victor Martinez to everyday catcher. Cue the shrieks. I mean, I was really happy with the Martinez signing, but I don't want to see him behind the dish every day.

Now let's just say hypothetically, that Dombrowski decides NOT to put Martinez at catcher every day even with Vlad on the roster. Now everyone is set up for discontent. Either Guerrero or Martinez will be squeezed out of playing time, and I don't see either of them being happy with that. Some might say Vlad could play right field some days, since Magglio is now 37 years old. Uh, did you see him in right field during the playoffs this year? OK. Let us put that idea through the shredder post-haste.

I haven't mentioned Alex Avila here, but he's young enough that he can wait to be a full-time catcher. He can use more time to develop. He hasn't proven himself offensively. I feel like he'll be all right.

I don't want the defensive troubles of the 2008 team to be repeated in 2011. I don't want a roster full of guys who are chafing at their roles. Don't you remember Pudge asking to be traded, and how we got Kyle Farnsworth in return? I apologize for taking you there, but it's a necessary reality check. I shuddered as I was typing it, believe me.

I can't come to a conclusion here. My brain is conflicted and fragmented. I want Vlad. I want good defense. I want happy ball players. I want it all.