Dog Days

Well, we completed a sweep of the Cleveland Indians today. Excuse me if I don't do any cartwheels. You see, the Twinks continue to win at a seemingly unsustainable pace, which they somehow manage to sustain. Go take a flying flip off the top of the Metrodome, would you, Ron Gardenhire? Sorry. I really respect Gardy. I just want him to stop sticking it to us, you know?

Justin Verlander rebounded nicely from a crap-tastic outing against the Yankees (which I mercifully missed). Once again, however, we must temper any good feelings with the reminder that this was the Cleveland Indians. Actually, I didn't really have any good feelings to temper after today's win. I feel so underwhelmed.

Maybe part of my malaise is related to the doom and gloom news that Magglio may not return at all this season, and may have played his last game as a Tiger. NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I cannot handle that. I want Mi Magglio to stay here. Retire here. Be enshrined here for eternity. Sigh.

Kansas City tomorrow. I will be attending the festivities. Whoop-de-do. Bondo, do me a favor and hold the head case antics for one game, okay? Bruce Chen, do me a favor and give up a boatload of runs, okay? Umpires, do me a favor and don't screw us over tomorrow, okay? Jim Leyland, do me a favor and run out a lineup that doesn't feature Gerald Laird hitting second, okay?

Maybe I'll try to muster up some rah rah for tomorrow's game. Meanwhile...meh.

Shaking in My Boots

Um, I'm what you might mildly term a nervous wreck for tonight's opener against the Twins at the Metrodump. We play like garbage there most nights, and it's no wonder, what with the giant garbage bag of an outfield wall they have. That place is a nightmare. Our record against the Twins this year at the dome is a terrifying 1-5. Let's all give thanks the place is being shuttered after this season.

Another reason for my trepidation is Minnesota's manager Ron Gardenhire. I respect him highly as a manger, and he squeezes more victories out of a smaller payroll than anyone I know. He also seems to be a genius in the motivational department, as the Twins are always making a late run at the playoffs.

Why is the fact that Justin Morneau and Joe Crede (wretched Tiger killer) are both out for the season not making me feel any better? Sigh.

I feel a great need for moral support for tonight's game. Shall we designate a sports bar to meet up, hold each other's hands and make it through this game together? Just name the place, I will be there.

Too Good to Be True?

In his regular piece "K Korner" for ESPN the Magazine, Tim Kurkjian reports that after the first exhibition game this pre-season, Ron Gardenhire found a note on his desk from Justin Morneau.  It read "Gardy, I forgot to run sprints after the workout yesterday.  I'm fining myself."  With the note was a $100 bill.

Wowee.  Justin Morneau, are you for real?  Of course, his game earns mad respect.  Now he's Mr. Integrity, too?

Cool story.

Pilfering from the Twins

As you know by now, the Tigers have hired Rick Knapp as their new pitching coach, and are likely to hire a bullpen coach from within the organization.   Knapp has been the Twins minor league pitching coordinator for the past 12 years.  Many others have covered this news already, so I'll just say this:

I like this move from the standpoint that I like what Minnesota does with its small budget each year.  I think it's largely due to Ron Gardenhire.  He's a terrific manager in my view.  During Twins batting practice at Comerica one game last year, I saw him in shallow outfield shagging fly balls.  I'd be beside myself if I had to lose my top talent every year or so and start over.  (Side note, I'd also be freaking mad if I had to play in a dump like the Metrodome.  Every time I see the stupid carpet and the baggie, I feel the chunks rising.)  So, if Rick Knapp is any part of what's been going on with the Twins, I'm happy as a clam.  And bonus, we take away from one of our top divisional rivals.